| Forum Home | ||||
| PC World Chat | ||||
| Thread ID: 55257 | 2005-03-06 19:41:00 | Monday Laughs: The capricious ways of women | Billy T (70) | PC World Chat |
| Post ID | Timestamp | Content | User | ||
| 331341 | 2005-03-06 19:41:00 | Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party . He is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all . He didn't even remember how he got home from the party . As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong while he was drunk . He had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table . And, next to them, a single red rose! Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed . He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean . So is the rest of the house . He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror . Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick!: "Honey, your breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight . I love you, my darling!" He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper . His son is also at the table eating . Jack asks, "Son . . . what on earth happened last night?" "Well, you came home after 3 A . M . , drunk and, like, totally out of your mind . You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door . " Utterly confused he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a red rose by the bed, your mum left a loving note on my mirror, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?" His son replies, "Oh THAT! . . . . . . . . . . . Mum dragged you off to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed: Leave me alone, lady, I'm married!" Cheers Billy 8-{) :) |
Billy T (70) | ||
| 331342 | 2005-03-06 19:50:00 | Ahhhh, I do like that one Billy! Thanks! | John H (8) | ||
| 331343 | 2005-03-06 20:53:00 | I am not the Jack mentioned below. I can prove it. I would not have mentioned "I'm Married". Jack |
JJJJJ (528) | ||
| 331344 | 2005-03-06 21:52:00 | That's one of the best yet - I like it :) | Greg (193) | ||
| 331345 | 2005-03-07 04:15:00 | This one is a trifle tasteless, but too good to waste . :eek: An old lady is very upset as her husband Albert had just passed away . She went to the undertakers to have one last look at her dearly departed husband . The instant she saw him she starts crying . One of the undertakers approaches to provide comfort at this sad and emotional moment . Through her tears she explains that she is upset because her dearest Albert was wearing a black suit, and it was his dying wish to be buried in a blue suit . The undertaker apologises and explains that traditionally, they always put the bodies in a black suit, but he'd see what he could arrange . The next day she returned to the undertakers to have one last moment with Albert before his funeral the following day . When the undertaker pulls back the curtain, she manages to smile through her tears as Albert is resplendent in a smart blue suit . She says to the undertaker "Wonderful, wonderful, but where did you get that beautiful blue suit?" "Well, yesterday afternoon after you left, a man about your husband's size was brought in & he was wearing a blue suit . His wife explained that she was very upset as he had always wanted to be buried in a black suit," the undertaker replied . The wife smiled at the man . He continued, "After that, it was simply a matter of swapping the heads" . |
Billy T (70) | ||
| 331346 | 2005-03-07 08:10:00 | sick.... but so funny.... | robsonde (120) | ||
| 1 | |||||