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Thread ID: 58487	2005-06-02 05:02:00	Ten good excuses for not providing free tech support to "friends"	Peterj116 (6762)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
360565	2005-06-02 05:02:00	1 . "There really isn’t much I can do with this machine . " – This frequent situation occurs when someone wants to run high-end applications on a cheap, under-powered machine . Someone who just bought a 12-year-old 386 doesn't want to hear that it won't run Windows XP Professional . Many years ago, just to see what would happen, we took a hard disk from a 486 running Windows 95 and put it into a 286 with just 1 MB of RAM . To our surprise it didn’t fall at the first hurdle, but it took nearly 15 minutes to boot . Clicking the start button, however, caused it to grind to a halt . 2 . "I really don’t have time right now . " – Not a great excuse, as it often leads to the machine being left with you until you do have time . After tripping over it, bruising your shins, and learning a whole new repertoire of foul language, you take it apart to see what you can do, usually when you need to be doing something else . 3 . "This one is a bit beyond my capabilities . " – Known as the "professional suicide gambit with a double edged benefit”, no self-respecting tech likes to use this admission of defeat . But it does have the benefit of closing the door on all future unofficial job requests . Unfortunately, it may also darken the reputation of anyone courageous enough to use it . Note: In this context "courageous" means "stupid" . The term "courageous" is used in the British Parliament where it is considered impolite to call one’s colleagues stupid . 4 . "My employer insisted on me signing an exclusivity of service agreement . " – The response is a rather pompous line to take, and one that doesn't work with family and friends . It may however, be used in situations where a near stranger decides that you will do as a cheap technical support resource . After considerable persuasion they may be able to talk you into working for them at an hourly rate that would salve your conscience . Use this one if you don’t mind people considering you a bit stuffy . 5 . "This job will be expensive . " – Advise the customer that the job will cost slightly less than the machine's replacement value and suggest that they consider purchasing a new system . Hopefully they will take your advice, buy a new PC, and leave you alone . 6 . "Great, you could help me with my <insert your own project that needs attention> . " – This reverse psychology technique is a great way to turn the tables on the person seeking free support . If the local house painter wants help with his PC, ask him to paint your windows in return . You can use this response for a whole range of services, including: a kitchen or bathroom remodel, car servicing, lawn care, and so forth . The barter system is also beneficial because in some locations (including the United Kingdom) it is outside the Income tax system . In the past I have had my garage door repaired in return for fitting a new hard disk and CD writer . People who don’t agree to a fair, reciprocal service are trying to take advantage of your good nature . 7 . "I am not allowed to work on personal machines during work . " – The worst favor seekers are coworkers who use the IT department as a source of free support for their personal systems . These requests can be a real headache if your employer takes exception to company facilities and time being used for private purposes--a very understandable position . I remember one coworker who regularly asked us to work on her personal system . She insisted that, as she used it to work from home, we should be responsible for sorting out the horrible mess her children caused by loading a variety of dubious applications . We resolved the problem by passing the request to her department head so that he could agree to the cross charge . Not surprisingly he refused, saying she did very little work in the office and nothing from home . 8 . "Why don't you take it to <insert the name of a trusted local repair shop> . " – Let’s not forget those techs who scratch a living from home PC users . Many of us have worked for small local repair shops and know that it can be a precarious way to make a living . Sometimes it can be tactful to suggest your local repair shop if you don’t feel that you can’t take a job on . Unless you routinely refer them ill-tempered customers, they'll likely be grateful for the business and may even reward you with a handsome discount . 9 . "I can’t fix this problem without the original system disks . " – This response works well when you know for sure that someone doesn't have a valid software license . I once encountered a customer with a special vendor locked edition of Microsoft Publisher . After we had replaced his processor and motherboard the locked version no longer worked . Without thinking, I blurted out that I had a normal version . I should have kept me mouth shut . The customer pursued me for weeks, until I told him a story about the disks being corrupt . 10 . "Just say “No” . – This simple refusal is the most honest approach when declining a request for free support . You don't even need to justify your actions . You clock off at the end of the day, just as your colleagues do, and you're entitled to enjoy your free time . You may not want to spend all your waking hours obsessed by computers and the problems they produce . It is remarkable how easy we techs become somebody’s best friend when they want a favor, yet as soon as they get what they want, we are forgotten until the next time they need something . and this little gem: " . . . Now, systems are dropped off at my house with the full awareness that I will look at it in my free time in about a week . Don't like that time table? Then take it to someone that thinks it is a crisis that you can't get your latest porn fix . (wear gloves on that computer!)" From here ( . com . com/5138-10877-5722017 . html" target="_blank">techrepublic . com . com)	Peterj116 (6762)
360566	2005-06-02 22:07:00	Thanks Peterj116. Printed and stuck on my wall	qyiet (6730)
360567	2005-06-02 22:44:00	But I like helping friends and family. Although I've had to say Number 1 a few times. But they usually end up doing some sort of upgrade once they understand its for real.	pctek (84)
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