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Thread ID: 62126	2005-09-27 09:01:00	Thou shalt not smack thy kid! ???	Myth (110)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
391390	2005-09-27 09:01:00	Just had a quick look at Campbell on TV3 and they were doing a thing on kids, punishment etc. I was wondering what are your views on it, as a kid, parent, grandparent? Also should caning be bought back to schools? My views (as a parent, and also as a kid once)... I was bought up under my fathers hand (and usually leather belt). It wasn't easy, but then it did me no wrong as I got older and stayed outta trouble. As a parent looking back, though I felt at times my father was rather tough, I will try to be a bit fairer on my kid. I believe there is nothing wrong with physical punishment, so long as its not done out of anger, and therefore not taken to extremes. However I do try to avoid smacking my kid, and usually a stern 'No' suffices. I also believe if physical punishment is about to administered, the kid should know why they are getting punished, what they did wrong. As far as the cane, ever noticed that teachers started getting beaten up more since they stopped using it?	Myth (110)
391391	2005-09-27 09:14:00	I got my ass kicked and whipped numerous times at home and at school, I grew up with many who didn't get this treatment and they didn't fall off the rails...Personally I don't think anyone has the right to hit someone who can't give it back. If ya want to be big and smack people around then pick on someone who can go toe to toe with ya, and if my boy was to get the cane (granted it can't happen in this day) I would take the right to cane whoever done it.	Metla (12)
391392	2005-09-27 09:45:00	I (as a kid) have been smacked a couple of times and it has never done me any harm (apart from hurting!) - and i would always have deserved it	Dannz (1668)
391393	2005-09-27 09:45:00	Personally I'm against smacking. I've spent the last 12 years raising children and both my wife and I have succumbed on rare ocassions. Only when they were little, on the basis that a short sharp shock got the message across. And probably we were tired and at the end of our patience. So we haven't used smacking and have mannered but boisterous children. They understand respect. The main thing is that they do not fear their parents. The problem generally is that some "parents" do not know any limits. At the moment the law allows an assault on your own child, that would be a criminal assault if you did it to anyone else. That is plain weird. The biggest threat is from step-fathers. They kill children. So the law is an ass when it protects such people.	Winston001 (3612)
391394	2005-09-27 10:15:00	Some fair comments so far but I agree with smacking - albeit the short sharp variety used to remind children not to play on the road, eat razor blades etc. :D But you get the message... But to ban smacking, why restrict all parents because of the actions of a few who cannot control themselves? And yes I agree, if a parent goes overboard then as Metla stated, let others do unto them. If a smack on the bottom is intended for the well being of a child, is it then fair that the parent has a criminal conviction against their name? Don't get me wrong, I'm referring to smacks on the bum - the head and face are sacrosanct and the torso should be off limits too. And under no circumstances, should anything other than the hand be used. (BTW have a look into the history of the 'rule of thumb') I take it the alternative to smacking is reasoning with your child. How do you reason with someone who isn't being reasonable? And you'd know this Winston : how can you have a logical argument with someone who isn't being logical? I would support the use of a short sharp smack on the behind if it was a choice between that or "Jimmy, do get off the road please. Now listen to Mummy Jimmy, it's not safe, do be a dear and get off the road." A bit of a dramatic example I know but hey it supports my argument.... This thread should almost be combined with the other thread on teenage behaviour and unwanted pregnancies. IMHO we should undergo some sort of assessment / test before we are allowed to be a parent. Are you emotionally and financially secure enough, as well as sufficiently responsible enough, to bring another life into this world? Can you care for this life for at least the next 16 years? Can you teach this young person to be an equally responsible and contributing member of society? Draconian & a tad OTT I know, but what other answers are there? Restrictions on child numbers won't work - the restrictions in China are going to have monumental social consequences in the next decade or two - mark my words. Regarding the step-father comment, whilst I find it offensive I won't take it personally and I presume you are referring to some sort of statistical average Winston? Are there any stats on that? I'm a step father (I'll bet you never saw that coming) and I 100% don't consider myself to be 'at risk' (A couple of members whom I have met should be able to vouch for that). Just my opinion... A :cool:	andrew93 (249)
391395	2005-09-27 10:15:00	A good whack on the bum with the old bamboo never hurt anyone, but you couldnt sit down for a while.... :xmouth:	bob_doe_nz (92)
391396	2005-09-27 11:38:00	I don't believe smacking should be outlawed, I don't have any right to tell others how to bring up their kids, and I wouldn't ask the government for guiddence in any matter, they make too many laws as it is. However I think the punishment should fit the crime, and teachers who cane pupils should have been held accountable every time they did so. Funny how it was always the same few teachers that couldn't do their job with handing out violence. If they couldn't handle the kids they should get rid of them , If they can't handle kids full stop they should get another job. I pesonally would like to see teachers get a big raise, just in the hope it brings more capable people into the feild. They should be evaluated and fired for non-performance and having retarded personalities.	Metla (12)
391397	2005-09-27 12:25:00	But to ban smacking, why restrict all parents because of the actions of a few who cannot control themselves? Don't get me wrong, I'm referring to smacks on the bum - the head and face are sacrosanct and the torso should be off limits too . And under no circumstances, should anything other than the hand be used . ) IMHO we should undergo some sort of assessment / test before we are allowed to be a parent . Are you emotionally and financially secure enough, as well as sufficiently responsible enough, to bring another life into this world? Can you care for this life for at least the next 16 years? Can you teach this young person to be an equally responsible and contributing member of society? Regarding the step-father comment, whilst I find it offensive I won't take it personally and I presume you are referring to some sort of statistical average Winston? Are there any stats on that? I'm a step father (I'll bet you never saw that coming) and I 100% don't consider myself to be 'at risk' Just my opinion . . . A :cool: Firstly let me apologise to you Andrew and all the thousands of decent step-parents . I hesitated about making that point, but statistically around the world step-parents offend much more than natural parents against children . I'll try to find a link . Lets imagine Section 59 of the Crimes Act 1962 was repealed = no defence to hit a child . I smack my daughter for disobeying me yet again by running across the supermarket carpark . Does anyone seriously think that a police officer is going to be even slightly interested? Or a busy Judge? It won't happen . In fact give a stranger a firm smack on the bottom tomorrow . See what happens . The police won't arrest you but you might get a nice padded room to sit in for a while . :D This is a very serious issue . Violence happens in all levels of society . When we allow it to occur to defenseless children, we should be ashamed . The trouble is that one mans smack is anothers knockout punch . I could almost live with your suggestion Andrew about open hand only, nothing else used and only on the buttocks . But I really fear that this would be abused and open to argument - "Really officer, she moved, its her fault" The facts are these - children die in New Zealand at the hands of their parents/caregivers . We've seen fence palings, heavy belts, and electric cords used . And parents found not guilty of assault when using such things (where the poor kid survives) .	Winston001 (3612)
391398	2005-09-27 12:27:00	But to ban smacking, why restrict all parents because of the actions of a few who cannot control themselves? Don't get me wrong, I'm referring to smacks on the bum - the head and face are sacrosanct and the torso should be off limits too . And under no circumstances, should anything other than the hand be used . ) Regarding the step-father comment, whilst I find it offensive I won't take it personally and I presume you are referring to some sort of statistical average Winston? Are there any stats on that? I'm a step father (I'll bet you never saw that coming) and I 100% don't consider myself to be 'at risk' Just my opinion . . . A :cool: Firstly let me apologise to you Andrew and all the thousands of decent step-parents . I hesitated about making that point, but statistically around the world step-parents offend much more than natural parents against children . I'll try to find a link . Lets imagine Section 59 of the Crimes Act 1962 was repealed = no defence to hit a child . I smack my daughter for disobeying me yet again by running across the supermarket carpark . Does anyone seriously think that a police officer is going to be even slightly interested? Or a busy Judge? It won't happen . In fact give a stranger a firm smack on the bottom tomorrow . See what happens . The police won't arrest you but you might get a nice padded room to sit in for a while . :D This is a very serious issue . Violence happens in all levels of society . When we allow it to occur to defenseless children, we should be ashamed . The trouble is that one mans smack is anothers knockout punch . I could almost live with your suggestion Andrew about open hand only, nothing else used and only on the buttocks . But I really fear that this would be abused and open to argument - "Really officer, she moved, its her fault" The facts are these - children die in New Zealand at the hands of their parents/caregivers . We've seen fence palings, heavy belts, and electric cords used . And parents found not guilty of assault when using such things (where the poor kid survives ) .	Winston001 (3612)
391399	2005-09-27 12:28:00	Jug-cords are nasty, The mind boggles that parents can take to their kids with such a weapon, Might as well be wearing dusters.	Metla (12)
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