Forum Home
PC World Chat
Thread ID: 62068	2005-09-25 23:51:00	Monday Laughs: Now for the agrarian sector.......	Billy T (70)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
390910	2005-09-25 23:51:00	Farmer John lived on what had once been a quiet rural highway, but as the years went by, the traffic density built up at an alarming rate . Finally the traffic was so heavy and so fast that his chickens were being run over at a rate of five or six a day . So, one day Farmer John called the County Sheriff's office and said, "You've got to do something about all of these danged people driving so fast and killing all of my chickens . " "What do you want me to do?" asked the Sheriff . "I don't care" said Farmer John,"just do something about those crazy drivers!" So the next day the Sheriff had the county workers go out and erected a sign that said: SLOW: SCHOOL CROSSING . Three days later Farmer John called the Sheriff back and said, "You've got to do something about these drivers . The 'School Crossing' sign seems to make them go even faster . " So, the Sheriff sends out the county workers again, and this time they put up a new sign: SLOW: CHILDREN AT PLAY . That really sped them up, so Farmer John called and called and called the Sheriff every day for three weeks . Finally, he told the Sheriff, "Your signs are doing no danged good" and asked "Can I put up my own sign?" The Sheriff told him, "Sure thing, put up your own sign . " He was going to let Farmer John do just about anything in order to get him to stop calling every day to complain . Several days went by, but the Sheriff got no more calls from Farmer John . Three weeks later, curiosity got the best of him and he decided to give Farmer John a call . "How's the problem with those drivers? Did you put up your sign?" "Oh, I sure did," said Farmer John, "and not one chicken has been killed since then . I've got to go now" he said, "I'm very busy" and he hung up the phone . The Sheriff was really curious now, and he thought to himself: "I'd better go out there and take a look at that sign . . . it might be something that WE could use to slow down drivers . " So the Sheriff drove out to Farmer John's house, and his jaw dropped the moment he saw the sign . It was spray-painted on a sheet of wood: "NUDIST COLONY AHEAD" Cheers Billy 8-{)	Billy T (70)
390911	2005-09-25 23:52:00	"look out for chicks" ;)	tweak'e (69)
390912	2005-09-26 03:59:00	Girls Diary Saw John in the evening and he was acting really strangely I went shopping in the afternoon with the girls and I did turn up a bit late so I thought it might be that. The bar was really crowded and loud so I suggested we go somewhere quieter to talk. He was still very subdued and distracted so I suggested we go somewhere nice to eat. All through dinner he just didn't seem himself; he hardly laughed, and didn't seem to be paying any attention to me or to what I was saying. I just knew that something was wrong. He dropped me back home. I wondered if he was going to come in; he hesitated, but followed. I asked him again if there was something the matter but he just half shook his head and turned the television on. After about 10 minutes of silence, I said I was going upstairs to bed. I put my arms around him and told him that I loved him deeply. He just gave a sigh, and a sad sort of smile. He didn't follow me up, but later he did, and I was surprised when we made love. He still seemed distant and a bit cold, and I started to think that he was going to leave me, and that he had found someone else. I cried myself to sleep.... Boys Diary All blacks lost to the Wallaby's Had sex though !	KiwiTT_NZ (233)
390913	2005-09-27 01:49:00	A duck hunter is out one day having no luck . He hunts the whole morning and couldn't get a single kill . On the way home he comes up to a farm house and flying over the barnyard is a big flock of fat mallards . Seeing his last chance for success, he takes aim at what looked like the biggest duck in the flock and gave it both barrels . The duck fell from the sky and landed in the middle of a barnyard . As the hunter nears the barnyard and the dead duck, he sees he's got himself a beauty . But when he is a mere 20 paces from the duck, a farmer steps out of the barn, picks up the duck and heads for the house . "Hey!" said the hunter, "Come back with my duck!" "Your duck?" says the farmer, "It was lying dead in my barnyard; it's MY duck . " "No! No! You don't understand!, shouts the hunter, "I shot it and it just happened to fall here . It's mine!" "Okay, city fella . We'll settle this the country way," says the farmer . "Country way? What's that?" says the hunter . "We take turns hitting each other as hard as we can," says the farmer . "Last man standing wins the duck . . . . That is, unless you're Yella . " "Of course I'm not yellow," says the hunter . "Fine . Country way it is," says the farmer . "Since we're on my property, I'll go first . " With that, the farmer takes a half step back, steadies himself, and kicks the hunter square in the groin as hard as he can . The hunter gasps, screams like an animal, falls on the ground, curls up in a knot, turns 3 shades of purple, and nearly dies . After a full half hour and with considerable difficulty, the hunter straightens up, gasps again, and in a high strained voice says, "Now . . . my . . . turn! The farmer replies: "Nah, I give up . Here's your duck . "	D. McG (3023)
390914	2005-09-28 19:18:00	How Was I Born? "Daddy, How was I Born?" Dad answered: "Ah, my son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway!" "Well, you see your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on MSN. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe." "We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive." "As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a blessed little Popup appeared and said: You've Got Male!"	Cicero (40)
1