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Thread ID: 77785	2007-03-22 01:22:00	European Terror Alert Levels	johcar (6283)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
535052	2007-03-22 01:22:00	The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved" . Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross . " Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out . Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance . " The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666 . Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide . " The only two higher levels in France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate . " The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability . It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of alert . Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing . " Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides . " The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs . " They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose" . Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels . The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy . These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish Navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish Navy .	johcar (6283)
535053	2007-03-22 21:02:00	The British will probably adopt their usual tactics of losing the war while sacrificing their allies until someone comes along to save them. During the last big war while they were leaving stuff all over France and running home, things got rather grim, so they adopted what was probably the most effective battle tactic ever known. As the unstoppable German armies proceeded to the west coast of Europe, the British infiltrated a deadly foe into the enemy ranks. These saboteurs spread the message "A British mistress for every German soldier and an English car in every German garage within 3 months". The will to win was destroyed and the German army decided to go as far East as possible even though war with Russia was suicide.	R2x1 (4628)
535054	2007-03-22 22:14:00	johcar that is brilliant, many thanks	Sue (33)
535055	2007-03-23 10:59:00	Those are absolutely awesome. Thanks for the post. Mucho Gracias, merci and danke.	beeswax34 (63)
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