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Thread ID: 80913	2007-07-09 06:26:00	Monday Laughs: Weird folk............	Billy T (70)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
567317	2007-07-10 12:50:00	Haha, oh wow. I loled.	roddy_boy (4115)
567318	2007-07-10 15:10:00	Absolutely brilliant :D:lol::D	beeswax34 (63)
567319	2007-07-10 21:02:00	:lol: :lol: :lol: thats awesome!!! ROFLMAO!!!! :lol: :lol:	wratterus (105)
567320	2007-07-10 21:24:00	Coming to you now, direct from the US of A, the comedy you have all been waiting for.......... CREATIONIST HUMOUR: One day a 6 year old girl was sitting in a classroom. The teacher was going to explain evolution to the children. The teacher asked a little boy: Tommy do you see the tree outside? TOMMY: Yes. TEACHER: Tommy, do you see the grass outside? TOMMY: Yes. TEACHER: Go outside and look up and see if you can see the sky. TOMMY: Okay. (He returned a few minutes later) Yes, I saw the sky. TEACHER: Did you see God up there? TOMMY: No. TEACHER: That's my point. We can't see God because he isn't there. Possibly he just doesn't exist. A little girl spoke up and wanted to ask the boy some questions. The teacher agreed and the little girl asked the boy: Tommy, do you see the tree outside? TOMMY: Yes. LITTLE GIRL: Tommy do you see the grass outside? TOMMY: Yessssss! LITTLE GIRL: Did you see the sky? TOMMY: Yessssss! LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the teacher? TOMMY: Yes LITTLE GIRL: Do you see her brain? TOMMY: No LITTLE GIRL: Then according to what we were taught today in school, she possibly may not even have one! Yessir, [sigh] only in America. I wonder how the creationists rationalise the fact that their special God created a whole bunch of competitive religions, all with their own special gods that argue with the American Way, and then set up a heap of other unamerican countries with weird names where those god-damned heathen Gods are killin' God-Fearin' Americans going about their God-fearin' business. Perhaps Seven Days was too much of a rush job and He would have been better to have employed some consultants, done a bunch of feasibility studies, set up some risk management strategies and planned an orderly exit strategy in case things went wrong. Cheers Billy 8-{) :p	Billy T (70)
567321	2007-07-11 05:31:00	Ponder these points - Can you cry under water? Real men don't cry -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? Very -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do you have to "put your two cents in" . . But it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? Michael Cullen -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity? No, that's why they have Holy Farmers, Holy Glassons and Holy Halensteins -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why does a round pizza come in a square box? If it came in a penis shaped box people would be upset -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- What disease did cured ham actually have? AIDS -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? Stupidity -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours? They may wake up every two hours, but overall they sleep about twice as much as adults . -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? Yes, but they can ask for a pardon . -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV? I object to all this sex on the television . I mean, I keep falling off! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? Pretending they're children, and the people are ants -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway . So they can take pictures from behind the one-way wall . -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural? Well, one of the guys who came up with the names was a pimp . . . the other wasn't . -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? Not all humans are decent . . . look at Australia! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? Are you going to stop it? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? That wouldn't make a very good TV series if he could -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! Evolution -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from? Babies, duh . That's what The Baby Factory's there for -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Yes, which is why it's often the religious types that harp on about it -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt? Because they're two completely different things? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window? I wouldn't know, I don't blow my dog᷊	V1sta (6614)
567322	2007-07-11 05:36:00	Lulu was a prostitute, but she didn't want her grandma to know. One day, the police raided a whole group of prostitutes at a sex party in a hotel, and Lulu was among them. The police took them outside and had all the prostitutes line up along the driveway when suddenly, Lulu's grandma came by and saw her granddaughter. Grandma asked, "Why are you standing in line here, dear?" Not willing to let her grandmother know the truth, Lulu told her grandmother that the policemen were there passing out free oranges and she was just lining up for some. "Why, that's awfully nice of them. I think I'll get some for myself," and she proceeded to the back of the line. A policeman was going down the line asking for information from all of the prostitutes. When he got to Grandma, he was bewildered ! and exclaimed "Wow, still going at it at your age? How do you do it? " "I just take my dentures out, rip the skin back and suck them dry.".. The policeman fainted. :lol:	wratterus (105)
567323	2007-07-11 06:24:00	V1sta did you have something to say lol?	beeswax34 (63)
567324	2007-07-11 06:44:00	V1sta did you have something to say lol?Lol, If you re-read V1sta's post you will realise he has already answered	Myth (110)
567325	2007-07-11 07:00:00	imgs.xkcd.com <- just for R2x1	Dannz (1668)
567326	2007-07-11 21:25:00	Yessir, [sigh] only in America . I wonder how the creationists rationalise the fact that their special God created a whole bunch of competitive religions, all with their own special gods that argue with the American Way, and then set up a heap of other unamerican countries with weird names where those god-damned heathen Gods are killin' God-Fearin' Americans going about their God-fearin' business . :thumbs: Spot on Billy . Good on ya . :thumbs: Not meaning to hijack this thread (the Fox FM Sydney transcript = LMAO!), but most all Americans will not realize that the USA was never founded as a Christian nation: e . g . George Washington knew how destructive religion was and never put himself forth as a Christian, other founding fathers were similar - such as Thomas Paine; and it was 1956 when their bank notes started to have "In God We Trust" - put there during the McCarthy communist 'witch hunt' .	Morpheus1 (186)
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