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| Thread ID: 86043 | 2008-01-01 05:37:00 | GB Acknowledges Existence Of Carbon Dioxide | SurferJoe46 (51) | PC World Chat |
| Post ID | Timestamp | Content | User | ||
| 626426 | 2008-01-01 05:37:00 | WASHINGTON—An unexpected total reversal which environmentalists and scientists worldwide are calling groundbreaking, President George W. Bush, for the first time in his political career, has openly admitted the existence of carbon dioxide following the release of the new U.N. Global Environment Outlook this last week of December. The unheralded implication has wide-ranging effects upon exhalation, club soda, beer and photosynthesis. "Carbon dioxide, a molecule which contains one atom of carbon bonded with two atoms of oxygen, is a naturally occurring colorless gas exhaled by humans and metabolized, in turn, by plants," Bush told a stunned White House press corps surprised at his lucidity and pronouncement. "As a leading industrialized nation, we can no longer afford to ignore the growing consensus of so many hysterical experts whose job it is to study our atmosphere. Carbon dioxide is really for real." Because carbon dioxide, (first described by 17th-century Flemish physician Jan Baptista van Helmont as a gas he referred to as "spiritus silvestre,") has long been denied by the Bush administration, the president's speech was widely hailed as a victory for advocates of empirically established scientific fact and Carbon Dioxide International/Ltd. upporters world-wide. "This has been a major step forward for national basic-chemistry policy," said longtime CO2 proponent and eighth-grade science teacher Linda Mattson. "By taking this brave stance, Bush has opened the door for the eventual acknowledgment that other molecular compounds, such as H20, for example, may in fact exist as well." Many of those whom Bush has long considered to be his most loyal followers, however, have expressed disappointment with the development. "There is nothing about any 'carbon dioxide' in the Bible," said Rev. Luke Hatfield of Christchurch Ministries in Topeka, KS. "What's next? Claims that so-called 'fossil' fuels come from mythical creatures like dinosaurs? This has been a sad step backward for our nation." A White House spokesman was careful to categorize the announcement as "cautious," and reiterated that the president is still not ready to take any position on the existence of polar ice caps, ozone, or a controversial idea held by many scientists and often referred to as "weather." In an interesting sidebar, stocks for Union Carbide and the Linde Corporation have doubled in the last minutes of fierce trading on Wall Street. Marketeers are awaiting the delayed opening of the stock market on Wednesday after revelers have returned to their desks from their four day Bacchanal.:thumbs: |
SurferJoe46 (51) | ||
| 626427 | 2008-01-01 06:28:00 | I wonder what he'd make of di-hydrogen monoxide??? I know - he'd get Homeland Security to ban it from all airline flights, because it's a colourless, odourless liquid (at room temperature).... :D | johcar (6283) | ||
| 626428 | 2008-01-01 06:40:00 | I wonder what he'd make of di-hydrogen monoxide??? I know - he'd get Homeland Security to ban it from all airline flights, because it's a colourless, odourless liquid (at room temperature).... :D ... and, not enough of it can kill you, and to much of it can kill you. Ken :cool: |
kenj (9738) | ||
| 626429 | 2008-01-01 07:08:00 | ... and, not enough of it can kill you, and to much of it can kill you. Ken :cool: Very true, one of the most addictive substances known. Also, a dangerous solvent capable of disolving almost anything with prolonged exposure. In mitigation, it must be pointed out that certain organic substances added to this fluid make a very popular life enhancing drink (Hops, barley, yeasts etc. and some time honoured skills are the additives) |
R2x1 (4628) | ||
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