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Thread ID: 97671	2009-02-23 09:46:00	Rules for Visiting the SI	Bozo (8540)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
750636	2009-02-23 09:46:00	Rules for visiting NZ's South Island are: 1 . Pull your pants up . You look like an idiot . 2 . Turn your cap right, your head ain't crooked . 3 . Let's get this straight: it's called a 'gravel road . ' I drive a Ute because I want to . No matter how slow you drive, you're gonna get dust on your Lexus . Drive it or get out of the way . 4 . They are cattle . That's why they smell like cattle . They smell like money to us . Get over it . Don't like it? SH1 goes north, find it and f*** off . 5 . So you have a $80,000 car . We're impressed . We have $250,000 Harvesters that are driven only 3 weeks a year . 6 . Every person in the South waves . It's called being friendly . Try to understand the concept . 7 . If that cell phone rings while a bunch of geese/pheasants/ducks/quail are coming in during the season, we WILL shoot it outta your hand . You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time . . 8 . Yeah . We eat trout, salmon, deer and duck . You really want sushi and caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop . 9 . The 'Opener' refers to the first day of duck season . It's a religious holiday , we will observe it . 10 . We open doors for women . That's applied to all women, regardless of age . 11 . No, there's no 'vegetarian special' on the menu . Order steak, or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham and turkey . 12 . When we set a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables and breads . We use three spices: salt, pepper, and Watties Tomato sauce! Oh, yeah - we don't care what you folks in Ponsonby call that stuff you eat . . IT AIN'T REAL CHILI!! 13 . You bring 'Coke' into my house, it better be brown, wet and served over ice . You bring 'Mary Jane' into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair . 14 . College and High School Rugby is as important here as the All Blacks, the Highlanders and the Crusaders and a heap more fun to watch . 15 . Yeah, we have golf courses - but don't hit the water hazards - it spooks the fish . 16 . Turn down that blasted car stereo! That thumpity-thump crap ain't music . We don't want to hear it anymore than we want to see your boxers! Refer back to #1! 17 . For role models refer to the "Mainland Cheese" and "Speights" boys . . . . 'good on ya, mate'! Was sent this by a friend - thought it was quite amuzing :lol:	Bozo (8540)
750637	2009-02-23 19:17:00	Yup - as a genyawine Southern Man, that's pretty much on the money DH! :thumbs:	nofam (9009)
750638	2009-02-23 19:41:00	I thought the South Island was a pretty good place. The middle island is the weird one. ;)	R2x1 (4628)
750639	2009-02-23 19:52:00	What drivel.	pctek (84)
750640	2009-02-23 20:23:00	Looks to me like it's plagiarised from an American (Southern States) joke - going by the use of the following terms: 'bait shop' '2 pounds of ham and turkey' 'IT AIN'T REAL CHILI' 'drive a truck' 'College and High School' (??)	Deane F (8204)
750641	2009-02-23 20:27:00	Lol... yeh it's a great place to be. Always loved the place down there.. What drivel. - Bluddy old sourpuss. Must be that time of the month!	fnphoto (2434)
750642	2009-02-23 20:32:00	'good on ya, mate'! Only the best beer in New Zealand. Very funny!	lordnoddy (3645)
750643	2009-02-23 20:44:00	Only the best beer in New Zealand. Very funny! Ahh... uh uh uh.... Never make such a rash statement.... :p	wratterus (105)
750644	2009-02-23 20:46:00	Looks to me like it's plagiarised from an American (Southern States) joke Meh - quite possibly is. I found some of them amuzing anyway.	Bozo (8540)
750645	2009-02-23 20:56:00	Ahh... uh uh uh.... Never make such a rash statement.... :p IMO - Speights is a great tasting beer heh. >.-	lordnoddy (3645)
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