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Thread ID: 97963	2009-03-05 15:03:00	Me and my ex - final closure	Greg (193)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
753819	2009-03-09 02:03:00	Couldn't agree more with those sentiments, Metla... ...and I'm not sure whether to laugh or feel sad about such comments on marriage relationships from a 15 year-old member... (Love the "I'm not an unfaithful guy." Gee, you've been tested on that already? Should I be impressed? Not impressed, though, by the "cheating b*tch" talk. Cynical uncouth talk from a grown-up sounds simply show-off copying when it comes from a kid. You're speaking to female members here too, remember...) But I don't want to single out just one member. There are several other big-tough-talkers in this thread who are (by my definition) still kids. They've not yet experienced anything like the sort of long-term relationship Greg had. And they're simply talking the kind of garbage people say about abstract ideas, with no comprehension of what love & commitment really means. Some of the "older" posters with vengeful comments about women are old enough to know better,though. (You know who you are. I assume from those smart-arse comments that some woman took more than you thought she deserved when she left you) But that can work both ways, of course, as Winston has thank heavens already pointed out. He also suggested you lighten up. I echo that - with a reminder that some couples split with an amicable agreement about dividing things up. I'm sorry Greg & his partner didn't manage that, but it doesn't mean all women are money-grubbers - which has so far been the tenor of this thread. And as pctek is the only female so far to post in this thread, it seemed time another one had a burst... Couldnt agree more with everything said here...	SolMiester (139)
753820	2009-03-09 02:03:00	Couldn't have said that better....there are always to sides to the story.... god knows why you feel the need to air your dirty laundry in public anyway?:( Greg and I don't like to admit it,but you are our only friends.:blush::crying	Cicero (40)
753821	2009-03-09 02:07:00	I think some people missed the point. I am not talking about personal experience I haven't been separated/divorced but my mates have. The male gets stiffed and the female is usually laughing all the way to the bank. Its not 50 50 at all the female normally gets what she wants. Its all well and good saying men get bitter and twisted, they do get bitter and twisted and its caused by the courts favouring the female. I'm sure you got to hear the mates' girlfriends side of the story as well as his!...	SolMiester (139)
753822	2009-03-09 02:24:00	I dont think it is an unfair statement to say the guy does get the raw deal when a woman leaves. Im learning still first hand how painful it is. But it isnt the ex's fault. It is the circumstances that happen with things like IRD and other scum. The systems they used must have been made by one vengeful woman! It would be very easy to slam the ex, but I dont want to join the battle of the sexes. Frankly Im glad shes gone. Its all about misdirected anger, and generally when you get a kick in the guts from the guv in a time when your still hurting from you ex, you tend to not think straight and say silly things, ultimately you just have to get on with it. Oh and good for you Greg, chapter closed and start of a new path aye!	rob_on_guitar (4196)
753823	2009-03-09 02:27:00	One question was asked what I did to deserve the payout. Well firstly it isn't much, especially considering the fact that her father is a millionaire, and her late mother's family are very wealthy. So the cash is no skin off her back. Secondly I helped support her for 2 & 1/2 years when she worked only part time while she obtained a Masters degree - I paid virtually all the houshold expenses during that time. I also gave her comprehensive help when she obtained an American certificate in her proffession. I also gave her tons of material help, eg computers, software and PC tuition. Further, I negotiated the purchase of the home, getting $15k off the asking price; got a $2k reduction off the cost of her new car; did all the household repairs and maintenance, including fixing roof leaks, fixing locks on two doors, repairing the second bathroom cistern, repairing dishwasher, getting a few 100 bucks off the purchase of a fridge, cooking virtually all meals, especially when her friends and family visited... and the list goes on. Gee Greg, 1)-I fail to see how her families wealth entitles you to any money? 2)-Marriage is a partnership, I support my wife period. We do however get some help from the govt. 3)-Who purchased the home, her, you or both...did you both provide equal deposits? 4)-This isnt America where the spouse with the bigger income provides alimony to the other partner... 5)-Your claim of throwing your new found wealth into a Jag shows your immaturity. I too have gone through a marriage break-up, I too got the pay-out. We went 50/50, even though I did all the renovations, but really, end of the day, your marriage is a PARTNERSHIP, not I did, she didnt tit for tat. The hardiest thing for me, was letting go of all the dreams we had built together, realising I had faults too, and being man enough to work on them so I didnt have to face that situation again. Perhaps you need to do the same.........still!	SolMiester (139)
753824	2009-03-09 02:57:00	Why does peoples have a problem with the jag? I saw one recently here in chch, early 90's, body mint, it ran with minimal smoke, guy wanted $2200 for it. If i had the cash on me id be drivin it right now. So greg my advice to you, buy a project jag. Spend the money over time and build up a much healthier relationship with your new found joy	hueybot3000 (3646)
753825	2009-03-09 03:16:00	Gee Greg, 1)-I fail to see how her families wealth entitles you to any money? 2)-Marriage is a partnership, I support my wife period. We do however get some help from the govt. 3)-Who purchased the home, her, you or both...did you both provide equal deposits? 4)-This isnt America where the spouse with the bigger income provides alimony to the other partner... 5)-Your claim of throwing your new found wealth into a Jag shows your immaturity. I too have gone through a marriage break-up, I too got the pay-out. We went 50/50, even though I did all the renovations, but really, end of the day, your marriage is a PARTNERSHIP, not I did, she didnt tit for tat. The hardiest thing for me, was letting go of all the dreams we had built together, realising I had faults too, and being man enough to work on them so I didnt have to face that situation again. Perhaps you need to do the same.........still! Sol... you've always had your head in the clouds, but your comments here show that you've brought it down and got it wedged in your rear end. "new found wealth"?? I hardly call 50k "wealth" you poor bugger! :lol:	Greg (193)
753826	2009-03-09 03:17:00	It'd pay off my overdraft.....	johcar (6283)
753827	2009-03-09 04:03:00	The regular mention of 50 - 50 split of assetts reminds me of my divorce about 25 years ago. The house was sold and split 50-50. The contents were split 50-50. The small bank balance was split 50-50. BUT. I wanted to keep the work truck and paid half of its value to her. I wanted to keep my workshop complete and paid half of its value to her. I had long term paid in private superannuation worth a lot of money (paying in about 10% of my then income) and did not want to cash it in to pay her half - so we engaged an actuary to work out what it would be worth when I retired and I paid her half of that estimate. In the end the 50-50 became 85-15 to her as I paid her off from my original 50 percent. HOWEVER.... We still managed to be civil to each other and that big pay-off of the super was well worth it. I have been retired for nearly fifteen years now drawing my super and occasionally think how well-off I am and how I really did get the better part of the bargain. In fact, although I have not seen or heard of her for many years I occasionally feel sorry for the lady and wonder how she has coped over the years.	Scouse (83)
753828	2009-03-09 04:20:00	The regular mention of 50 - 50 split of assets reminds me of my divorce about 25 years ago. The house was sold and split 50-50. The contents were split 50-50. The small bank balance was split 50-50. BUT. I wanted to keep the work truck and paid half of its value to her. I wanted to keep my workshop complete and paid half of its value to her. I had long term paid in private superannuation worth a lot of money (paying in about 10% of my then income) and did not want to cash it in to pay her half - so we engaged an actuary to work out what it would be worth when I retired and I paid her half of that estimate. In the end the 50-50 became 85-15 to her as I paid her off from my original 50 percent. HOWEVER.... We still managed to be civil to each other and that big pay-off of the super was well worth it. I have been retired for nearly fifteen years now drawing my super and occasionally think how well-off I am and how I really did get the better part of the bargain. In fact, although I have not seen or heard of her for many years I occasionally feel sorry for the lady and wonder how she has coped over the years. I noted a Mrs Scouse married a millionaire some years ago?	Cicero (40)
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