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Thread ID: 102551	2009-08-24 00:10:00	Monday Laughs........Stories with a moral	Billy T (70)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
803730	2009-08-27 00:28:00	Couldn't you see the tongue in my cheek WolfForest22??? :D But truly, when you think of an Air Force, do you immediately visualise transport aircraft? I don't . Air Force to me means fighter jets - sure, the transport guys are there and they do a damn fine job, as do the chopper pilots . But Helen immasculated the Air Force (among other organisations) when she decided to invest in bloody great floating targets instead, and also buying land transport vehicles for the Army that cost a bomb to maintain and don't easily fit inside a transport aircraft anyway . OK - enough ranting - back to the jokes!!!! Never justify yourself to a twit Jo . !	Cicero (40)
803731	2009-08-27 00:35:00	Couldn't you see the tongue in my cheek WolfForest22??? :D But truly, when you think of an Air Force, do you immediately visualise transport aircraft? I don't . Air Force to me means fighter jets - sure, the transport guys are there and they do a damn fine job, as do the chopper pilots . But Helen immasculated the Air Force (among other organisations) when she decided to invest in bloody great floating targets instead, and also buying land transport vehicles for the Army that cost a bomb to maintain and don't easily fit inside a transport aircraft anyway . OK - enough ranting - back to the jokes!!!! Floating targets lol, I think the navy air defence says if it flies it dies lol .	prefect (6291)
803732	2009-08-27 05:27:00	Warning - Swearing at Work Dear Employees: It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their colleagues . Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated . We do, however, realise the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with colleagues . Therefore, a list of 13 new and innovative 'TRY SAYING' phrases has been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner . Try Saying: I think you could do with more training Instead Of: You don't have a f*ing clue, do you? Try Saying: She's an aggressive go-getter Instead Of: She's a fing power-crazy btch Try Saying: Perhaps I can work late Instead Of: And when the f* do you expect me to do this? Try Saying: I'm certain that isn't feasible Instead Of: F* off ase- hole Try Saying: Really? Instead Of: Well f me backwards with a telegraph pole Try Saying: Perhaps you should check with… Instead Of: Tell someone who gives a f* . Try Saying: I wasn't involved in the project . Instead Of: Not my f*ing problem . Try Saying: That's interesting . Instead Of: What the f? Try Saying: I'm not sure this can be implemented within the given timescale . Instead Of: No fing chance mate . Try Saying: It will be tight, but I'll try to schedule it in Instead Of: Why the f* didn't you tell me that yesterday? Try Saying: He's not familiar with the issues Instead Of: He's got his head up his f**ing ase . Try Saying: Excuse me, sir? Instead Of: Oi, f* face Try Saying: Of course, I was only going to be at home anyway Instead Of: Yeah, who needs f*ing holidays anyway .	johcar (6283)
803733	2009-08-27 07:22:00	Awesome :D	Renmoo (66)
803734	2009-08-27 08:26:00	I know this has been posted before, be it's bloody good. :D A teacher gave her class of 11 year olds an assignment: Excellent ! Misty :D :D	Misty (368)
803735	2009-08-27 23:37:00	I THINK YOU ARE THE FATHER OF ONE OF MY KIDS A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from. So he says, 'Do you know me?' To which she replies, 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.' Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, 'Are you the stripper from the stag party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery?' She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No, I'm your son's teacher."	johcar (6283)
803736	2009-08-27 23:42:00	I THINK YOU ARE THE FATHER OF ONE OF MY KIDS A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from. So he says, 'Do you know me?' To which she replies, 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.' Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, 'Are you the stripper from the stag party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery?' She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No, I'm your son's teacher." Haha.	somebody (208)
803737	2009-08-28 00:05:00	Haha. x2, that would be a bit embarrassing.. :lol:	wratterus (105)
803738	2009-08-28 22:32:00	Jake was dying . His wife sat at the bedside . He looked up and said weakly: 'I have something I must confess . ' 'There's no need to, 'his wife replied . 'No,' he insisted, 'I want to die in peace . I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!' 'I know,' she replied . 'Now just rest and let the poison work . '	Cicero (40)
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