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Thread ID: 102903	2009-09-06 05:43:00	The King's English Made Easy! Attn: Jamuz!	SurferJoe46 (51)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
807175	2009-09-06 05:43:00	English is Easy!!! 1) The bandage was wound around the wound. 2) The farm was used to produce produce. 3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse. 4) We must polish the Polish furniture. 5) He could lead if he would get the lead out. 6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert. 7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present. 8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum. 9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes. 10) I did not object to the object. 11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid. 12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row. 13) They were too close to the door to close it. 14) The buck does funny things when the does are present. 15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line. 16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow. 17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail. 18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear. 19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests. 20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend? Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England nor French fries in France ... Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat, not bread. We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square. We ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same; while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on. Flammable things are just as risky as inflammable ones. English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why when the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out they are invisible. PS. - Why doesn't 'Buick' rhyme with 'quick' There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that is 'UP.' It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP? At a meeting, why does a topic come UP? Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report? We call UP our friends. And we use lights to brighten UP a room; we polish UP the silver; we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen. We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car. At other times the little word has real special meaning. People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses. To be dressed is one thing but to be dressed UP is special. And this UP is confusing: A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP. We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night. After you cut a tree down, you cut it UP. We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP! To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP, look UP the word UP in the dictionary. In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4th of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions. If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used. It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more. When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP. When the sun comes out we say it is clearing UP. When it rains, it wets the earth and often muddies things UP. When it doesn't rain for awhile, things dry UP. One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it UP, for now my time is UP. Time to shut UP! If you found a two letter word interesting, try a triple like SET - - on your own please. e.g., a hen can SET eggs, but jelly won't SET with a chicken sitting on it.	SurferJoe46 (51)
807176	2009-09-06 06:22:00	Then on the other hand there is American speak such as, "We ain't got no Vegemite." Double negative I think.	Sweep (90)
807177	2009-09-06 06:26:00	We does TOO gots some Vegemite! Youse guys been watchin' too many Jimmy Cagney gangster flicks I think!	SurferJoe46 (51)
807178	2009-09-06 06:28:00	Read and acknowledged. sh!t that was confusing	Renmoo (66)
807179	2009-09-06 07:38:00	We does TOO gots some Vegemite! Youse guys been watchin' too many Jimmy Cagney gangster flicks I think! You speak your way and I will speak my way. In that post you suggest that all living in NZ speak the same way. Tēnā koe.	Sweep (90)
807180	2009-09-06 07:43:00	Try talking to a Glaswegian, Brummie or someone from the Black country they supposedly use the King's English too but you would never know it	gary67 (56)
807181	2009-09-06 07:54:00	And for every woman out there, there is a "man" :p	Renmoo (66)
807182	2009-09-06 08:17:00	We does TOO gots some Vegemite! Youse guys been watchin' too many Jimmy Cagney gangster flicks I think! And today we have observed Father's Day rather than June 21 as youse guys do. Another import from the USA which we could have done without.	Sweep (90)
807183	2009-09-06 09:37:00	Try talking to a Glaswegian, Brummie or someone from the Black country they supposedly use the King's English too but you would never know it Right on. They used to speak (probably still do) Anglo-Saxon/Old English in Old Hill village in the Black Country just 3 miles from where I lived, phrases like "wo bist du gain?"	Terry Porritt (14)
807184	2009-09-06 09:57:00	This is interesting about how they speak in the Black Country: www.bbc.co.uk	Terry Porritt (14)
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