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Thread ID: 115250	2011-01-09 23:00:00	Monday Laughs....A (mainly) US selection.....	Billy T (70)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
1168430	2011-01-10 07:49:00	See my sig Billy .... :D	SP8's (9836)
1168431	2011-01-10 08:15:00	The one man most responsible for New Zealand not being part of the German or Japanese Empire today, I kid you not, it got that close! Billy Wasn't he also the bloke who masterminded the invasion of Turkey via Gallipoli in the Great War? At great cost of ANZAC lives.	TideMan (4279)
1168432	2011-01-10 08:57:00	Wasn't he also the bloke who masterminded the invasion of Turkey via Gallipoli in the Great War? At great cost of ANZAC lives. Yes. He made a lot of mistakes. Fortunately he made a lot of correct decisions as well.... He was one of history's greatest men. After Gallipoli, he resigned and fought in the front line trenches in France for some time before being called back to parliament. Perhaps you should read some history. Ken ;) Sorry Billy. Didn't mean to hijack your weekly joke thread.	kenj (9738)
1168433	2011-01-10 09:21:00	A man was making passionate, frenzied love to his wife when all of a sudden he froze, completely still . His wife looked up at him angrily and said "what the HELL are you doing?" He looked down at her puzzled and said "I'm trying something I saw on an internet adult movie site . I think they call it buffering . . . . " :D	nofam (9009)
1168434	2011-01-10 09:38:00	See my sig Billy .... :D Yes I saw that. My comments were for the wider membership who may not realise how lucky they are, or that of all the participants in the global tragedy, there is one great man among the many involved, whom, more than any other, we have to thank for the final outcome. Cheers Billy 8-{)	Billy T (70)
1168435	2011-01-10 16:39:00	As regards Churchill and Gallipoli. The attack on the Dardenelles nearly came off, and if it had of it could have knocked Turkey out of the war and shortened it by a few years. And although the Anzac casualties were terrible the British and French lost a lot also.	Digby (677)
1168436	2011-01-10 17:32:00	The old guy says: "Wait a second boy, let me go get my hat." Good one Billy T.Thanks for that.	tut (12033)
1168437	2011-01-10 21:59:00	Cricket Comments. What do you call an Australian that can handle a bat? A vet What do you get if you cross the Australian cricket team with an OXO cube? A laughing stock. The Australian bobsleigh team want to ask Aussie cricket team for their advice about going downhill so fast! What’s the difference between Ricky Ponting and a funeral director? A funeral director doesn’t keep losing the ashes. Did you hear what the stump microphones picked up when The Ashes skippers tossed the coin on Boxing Day? Andrew Strauss called correctly and, quick as a flash, said to Ricky Ponting: “You lads can bat.’’ Just as quick, Ponting replied: “No, we can’t. We really can’t.” Of everyone in the Aussie team, who spends the most time at the crease? The woman who irons their cricket whites. What’s the height of optimism? An Aussie batsman putting on sunscreen. What is the main function of the Australia coach? To transport the team from the hotel to the ground. On his way out into the middle to bat, Ricky Ponting gets a call from his wife and teammate Michael Hussey tells her he’s heading out to the middle. His wife replies: “I’ll hold, he won’t be long!” What’s the difference between an Aussie batsman and a Formula 1 car? Nothing! If you blink you’ll miss them both. Who has the easiest job in the Australian squad? The guy who removes the red ball marks from the bats. What do Aussie batsmen and drug addicts have in common? Both spend most of their time wondering where their next score will come from. What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet? The entire Australian innings. What’s the Australian version of LBW? Lost, Beaten, Walloped. Why is Ricky Ponting cleverer than Houdini? Because he can get out without even trying. What does Ricky Ponting put in his hands to make sure the next ball is almost certainly going to be a wicket? A bat. What do you call a cricket field full of Australians ? A vacant lot. Why do Australians cricketers call their favourite drink XXXX? Because they can’t spell beer. Why can’t Australian blokes take their girlfriends to the cricket? They eat all the grass. What does an Australian batsman who is playing in The Ashes have in common with Michael Jackson? They both wore gloves for no apparent reason.	Roscoe (6288)
1168438	2011-01-10 22:25:00	Cricket Comments . The Australian bobsleigh team want to ask Aussie cricket team for their advice about going downhill so fast! What’s the difference between Ricky Ponting and a funeral director? A funeral director doesn’t keep losing the ashes . What’s the height of optimism? An Aussie batsman putting on sunscreen . Why can’t Australian blokes take their girlfriends to the cricket? They eat all the grass . Gold . . . Pure Gold . . .	lordnoddy (3645)
1168439	2011-01-10 23:15:00	Some good cricket jokes. But you could more honestly apply them to our team !	Digby (677)
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