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Thread ID: 116022	2011-02-14 01:57:00	Monday Laughs....Philosophy, and Ageism......	Billy T (70)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
1178055	2011-02-14 06:43:00	Here's one I came across on facebook; Have you ever wondered why A,B,C,D,DD,E,F,G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes? If you have wondered why but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed! {A} Almost Boobs. {B} Barely there. {C} Can't Complain. {D} Damn! {DD} Double damn! {E} Enormous! {F} Fake. {G} Get a Reduction. {H} Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up!	ubergeek85 (131)
1178056	2011-02-14 08:18:00	The rest are typical weak oldies jokes that remind me that I don't ever want to go to an old folks home . Just stay in the fast lane Digby . Live life to the full, then when they come to break down the door and take you in, they'll find you lying there with a satisfied smile on your face and a bank statement with a $1 remaining balance . You could have spent that too, but imagine the reading of your will, and all the disappointed relatives who were hoping to share in the spoils! Cheers Billy 8-{)	Billy T (70)
1178057	2011-02-14 08:18:00	THE OLDER CROWD A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office. 'Is it true,' she wanted to know, 'that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?' 'Yes, I'm afraid so,' the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied, I'm wondering, then, just how serious is my condition, because this prescription is marked 'No Repeats'.' As an intern pharmacist, I chuckled at the joke :p	Renmoo (66)
1178058	2011-02-14 21:41:00	TOP 10 A study has found that driving game enthusiasts tend to be riskier drivers . Here are the top 10 signs your fellow motorist is a gamer . 10 . They drag you off at the lights, try to run you off the road and kidnap you, then ask if they can purchase your parking credits . 9 . They roll down their window as they pass and stick their arm out in a Black Panther salute, just like they just did at Le Mans . 8 . There are tyre marks on your forehead . 7 . They are confused by all the cars driving on the left-hand side of the road . 6 . They don't bother with keys, just carry a crowbar . 5 . They have two hands firmly on the wheel and are looking ahead . 4 . The steering wheel has been replaced by a gamepad . 3 . They're writing to their MP about the appalling physics of the Pacific Highway . 2 . They think faster lap times give them bonus demerit points . 1 . They start the car by inserting a disk in the CD player .	johcar (6283)
1178059	2011-02-15 22:14:00	The Israelis are close to deploying an airport security device that eliminates the privacy concerns that come with full-body scanners at most airports . It's a booth you can step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on you . They see this as a win-win for everyone with none of this rubbish about racial profiling . It also would eliminate the costs of a long and expensive trial . Justice would be swift . Case closed! Picture this . You would be in the airport terminal and hear a muffled explosion . Shortly thereafter an announcement comes over the PA system . . . "Attention EL AL standby passengers ˜ we now have a seat available on flight number XXXX . Shalom! And have a pleasant flight . " Followed by: "Clean-up crew to security point A, please . "	wotz (335)
1178060	2011-02-16 03:43:00	As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the Kentucky back country. As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost and, being a typical man, I didn't stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch. I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to play. The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. I played like I've never played before for this homeless man. And as I played 'Amazing Grace,' the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept, we all wept together. When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full. As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "I never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years." I'm still lost.	WalOne (4202)
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