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Thread ID: 120339 2011-09-04 22:59:00 Monday Laughs:.......As you were, I've given up on religious jokes............... Billy T (70) PC World Chat
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1228645 2011-09-09 04:17:00 Understanding Marketing- Marketing 101

You see a fabulous girl/guy at a party.
You approach them and say, “I’m fantastic in bed.”

That’s Direct Marketing.

You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a fabulous girl/guy.
You have one of your friends approach them, point at you and say, “She’s/He’s fantastic in bed.”

That’s Advertising.

You see a fabulous girl/guy at a party.
You approach them to get their telephone number.
The next day you call and say, “Hi, I’m fantastic in bed.”

That’s Telemarketing.

You’re at a party and see a fabulous girl/guy.
You get up, straighten your clothes, walk up and pour them a drink. You open the door, pick up their bag after it drops, offer them a ride, and then say, “By the way, I’m fantastic in bed.”

That’s Public Relations.

You’re at a party and see a fabulous girl/guy.
They walk up to you and say, “I hear you’re fantastic in bed.”

That’s Brand Recognition. 		johcar (6283)
1228646 2011-09-10 01:20:00 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres ever aired on British TV and radio







1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'

2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - ' Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'

3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!'

4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - 'Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.'

5. US PGA Commentator - 'One of the reasons Arnie ( Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them .. Oh my god !! What have I just said??'

6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: 'You'd eat beaver if you could get it.'

7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!

8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: 'Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.'

9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on 'Look North' said: 'There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this. '

10 Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on 'Sky Sports': 'Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets.'

11. Michael Buerk on watching Philippa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: 'They seem cold out there. They're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts.'

12. Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: 'Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny; other weeks he prefers to do it by himself.' 		Cicero (40)
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