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| Thread ID: 124364 | 2012-04-22 08:59:00 | Help me with my naughty daughter | hotkiwi (6379) | Press F1 |
| Post ID | Timestamp | Content | User | ||
| 1271257 | 2012-04-26 22:58:00 | Nah! take the whole thing off her if its hers, and change the password if it is a family computer . Allow her back on after a short time and promise her next time she misbehaves the time off doubles and every time after that . Keep your word don't give in . Years ago my son was banned from TV for a week, consequently after getting caught cheating a few times the prospect of 6 months without TV got a result . He turned out good . Say it, mean it, do it! The hissy fits and sulking only last a short while, then peace will descend, albeit a little sullen at first . Parents earn zero respect by caving in to histrionics and threats, but do make sure both partners are singing the same song . Not for the same issue, but definitely the same principle, my daughter probably thought I was the meanest SOB on the planet for a few years and hardly spoke to me, but now that she is reaping the benefits of the self-discipline she learned, I have been rehabilitated! I spent some time with her in Melbourne earlier this week and she is doing so well in both her academic and her social/collegiate activities, is highly regarded by the Faculty, and we are very very proud of her . I also remember how wayward (in terms of those times) I was when a kid and how firm but fair my parents were . I still got into scrapes, but I had their support when I needed extricating but I wasn't shielded from the consequences and those principles shaped my entire future . Next to physical or emotional abuse, the worst thing parents can do to their children is to abdicate their parental responsibilities and/or fail to sing in tune . Billy 8-{) |
Billy T (70) | ||
| 1271258 | 2012-04-26 23:07:00 | Next to physical or emotional abuse, the worst thing parents can do to their children is to abdicate their parental responsibilities and/or fail to sing in tune. Agreed, well said there, and you should be proud of your daughter and her accomplishments too. A lot of the time, things like that aren't just "chance", but a childs upbringing will quite often be reflected in their character & achievements later on in life. |
Chilling_Silence (9) | ||
| 1271259 | 2012-04-26 23:11:00 | I second the use of the mac list. I never turn off my router but then that's because whenever I used to the internet would turn naff and disconnect alot after turning back on. Kind of irritating, but not the router's fault. I have a nice long wireless key and a mac address list on, and for a while I had static IP's set until I went back to uni. I probably should just set up an alternate address on the adapter, I just didn't realise it was possible at the time. This all said, it might be easier to simply turn it off on a night or take her laptop off her, simply because it would be cumbersome having to remember to turn off or on things every single night. Unless you could somehow write a script to do it instead. |
8ftmetalhaed (14526) | ||
| 1271260 | 2012-04-27 01:24:00 | This all said, it might be easier to simply turn it off on a night or take her laptop off her, simply because it would be cumbersome having to remember to turn off or on things every single night . Unless you could somehow write a script to do it instead . You should set out to change her behaviour via compliance processes . Give fair warning first that there are new rules coming . Explain quietly why there are new rules (previous noncompliance/dishonest behaviour) Tell her that web access is a privilege, not a right . Tell her in words of one syllable that you mean it, there are no second chances (they have all been taken) . Do not debate the merits of your decision, and yes, you will be the 'worst parent ever' and she will be 'humiliated in front of her friends' etc . She will get over it . Explain that trust and honesty are the issues (safety is secondary at this point, that will come with responsible usage) . Tell her how long she will lose the laptop if she breaks the rules, maybe one day for a first offence as a 'warning shot' across her bows, then three days, then a week, then indefinite with supervised access only for essential school work etc until she demonstrates by changes in attitude and behaviour that she can be trusted . Access includes sneaking off to friends' homes to get a facebook fix etc, you can probably monitor that anyway . Make sure your spouse/partner is on board, even if they initially disagree with the method, it is the outcome that is important and it is not about computer usage, it is about trust and honesty . Say it, mean it, do it Nothing ruins an adult's life more than a childhood full of unsuffered consequences . Good luck, and persistence Billy 8-{) |
Billy T (70) | ||
| 1271261 | 2012-04-27 07:02:00 | I'll probably get slapped by Jen for this but what the hell .... Hotkiwi .... how old is your daughter and does she know how to pole dance ??? ... I may be able to help keeping her off Facebook ... :devil | SP8's (9836) | ||
| 1271262 | 2012-04-27 07:31:00 | I'll probably get slapped by Jen for this but what the hell ... . Hotkiwi ... . how old is your daughter and does she know how to pole dance ??? ... I may be able to help keeping her off Facebook ... :devil A tad dirty dont you think? |
stratex5 (16685) | ||
| 1271263 | 2012-04-27 08:10:00 | I recently found out my friend's little sister works at the local strip bar. Glad I never went there. Small town strip bars don't work - you need either a lot of tourists on working holidays or a large population to hire from. |
Greven (91) | ||
| 1271264 | 2012-04-27 08:35:00 | A tad dirty dont you think? I am an old man ... it's compulsory ... :rolleyes: I'm not suggesting it is a solution ... only a different approach to the same problem ... in a commercial world, it's called "thinking outside the square" and people get paid megabucks to come up with such ideas ... until they end up in court ... :lol: |
SP8's (9836) | ||
| 1271265 | 2012-04-27 09:36:00 | Ok ill let you off this time;) | stratex5 (16685) | ||
| 1271266 | 2012-04-27 12:18:00 | I am an old man ... it's compulsory ... :rolleyes: I'm not suggesting it is a solution ... only a different approach to the same problem ... in a commercial world, it's called "thinking outside the square" and people get paid megabucks to come up with such ideas ... until they end up in court ... :lol: I was gonna suggest similar - get a boyfriend - take her interests off of Facebook -- But that could depend on her age, and of course could lead to different problems. |
wainuitech (129) | ||
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