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Thread ID: 123421	2012-02-23 12:07:00	Homeschooling	beetle (243)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
1260916	2012-02-24 21:31:00	My child is 15, She has been ousted from her youth group.( Her school dont seem to understand. weve already changed class's, she has counciling, but its obviousy not hitting the spot. Her friends are worried, they are concerned about her conversations to end it all, she is constantly depressed, and low, apathetic. She was constantly self harming. ( Ok. It's not just a bullying problem then. Beetle, not to be nasty but your daughter has a problem - not the bullies - bullies pick on what they perceive to be different or a target. She needs some medical help, not counselling rubbish. She possibly has depression or something else....I'm not the expert on that stuff. Take her to see some specialist doctors.	pctek (84)
1260917	2012-02-24 21:49:00	We will be going back to dr's this week, our usual one was on holiday and the locum was nasty and gave us both the creeps, so i didnt force us to continue dealing with him . You have to get reffered to other doctors, so small steps first . the paper war on any part of this seems horrendous, its not just a case of pulling a child out of school . you have to go thru hoops to explain why, then what is the future plan . how you intend to teach them, socialise and document this, all into educational stuff that MOE wants to hear . and then they may give you persmission . theres a whole lot of things going on, and its not easy to just say i want to do this, because those that have or arnt dealing with it, have no idea how it effects the family, its not just the child it effects . . . . . . . . . . . . it rocks the whole family in that house . ( no offence intended to those who are supportive or not ) Its not an easy decision, its one i never hoped i had to make . that my kids would swim thru school fine . . . . . . . but its not . I look at my child and i cant see what the bullies need to pick on . she was blue eyed blonde, she changed hair colour to get lost in the crowd a bit more, she is at least 5 . 8" and a size 8 maybe? so she is a model stick figure with height . she is pretty, well i think so . at the moment she has braces . . . . . . . . . . . nearly 2 years . . . . sigh . we are hoping they will come off this year . in the last year she has gone from a large group of friends to about 2 maybe 3 she trusts . who i trust . The self harm has stopped at the moment because we are aware of what is going on and we talk, and talk and talk . . . . . and actually this has helped, and she knows i will check if wshe is doing it again, we got rid of all her goodies . and any way this thread has gone way off topic, i was just asking about homeschooling . . . lol after talking about home school or correspondence school she has relaxed more, and we have had some very insightful conversations and i think i have a better understanding of what has been going on and what she is mostly scared of if we pull her out of HS . we are willing to try for a year and see how we go . thanks all	beetle (243)
1260918	2012-02-24 22:52:00	and any way this thread has gone way off topic, i was just asking about homeschooling...lol Yes it has gone way OT. But I think some of the underlying causes of your daughter's pain have emerged, and you need to treat the cause and not the symptom. Paul.Cov is spot on in my mind - request / demand a referral to a psychiatrist because from what has rolled out so far, it seems your daughter's needs are more than less qualified practitioners may be able to give. Goodies Guy, your troubles are unsettling, too, and not something I would want to go through, either. The worst that ever happened to me was a thug at primary primary school with a horseshoe shaped scar on his face who had it in for me. But that episode passed, and with the support of friends and parents I made it through unscathed physically and mentally. Which is what it's about. As long as there is a support group somewhere and you realise you're not alone, you'll make it through. Best wishes to you both.	WalOne (4202)
1260919	2012-02-25 01:55:00	I look at my child and i cant see what the bullies need to pick on . It's not looks .	pctek (84)
1260920	2012-02-25 06:17:00	I wasnt just meaning looks, but the whole child	beetle (243)
1260921	2012-02-25 09:02:00	Maybe your daughter is being victimised because the others envy her looks. And as for the guys at her school, guys are just dopes in the presence of a beautiful woman, so don't expect any sensible or logical behaviour from them. My own experience with bullies was limited to 2 *******s, and both eventually got their bluff called. The first was the worst, as he was recruiting a mate who was bigger than the teachers to dish out the punishment (couldn't understand what was in it for the big guy... but many years later his dad was jailed for sexual abuses, so the imagination can run there!). Anyway, one day I stood up to the puppet-master, who was of a similar size to me. He backed off and hid behind a friend without ever throwing a shot. After that I only had to threaten him one more time, and that was the last of his (and his big mates) bullying. I think most bullies want to look mean rather than be mean, so they seldom dish out more than threats (from my limited experience). The worst of their torture was mental (the always present threat) rather than physical. Good luck with your girl. At her age social issues rate ridiculously high among their priorities, and kids can get very screwed up over stuff that in hindsight can seem so inconsequential. If she has brains, then life is sure to get better as those that cause her trouble will eventually disipate, through leaving school themselves, early pregnancy, jobs, further education elsewhere, or simly through growing up a bit themselves.	Paul.Cov (425)
1260922	2012-02-25 09:18:00	I think the best thing you can do in answer to your original question is try and meet with other parents who are home schooling and ask their opinions about how they find it, especially if you can find some with girls a similar age to yours	gary67 (56)
1260923	2012-02-27 04:03:00	I've been homeschooled my entire life and turned out great. Loved it and what it gave me. So much more in some aspects than any school could	dpDesignz (15919)
1260924	2012-02-27 06:25:00	I've not read through this whole thread, but read enough to get the 'picture'. I used to be a youth pastor a few years ago before I got married, I'd suggest words with your local youth group leaders about her being ousted. The only reason we'd ever do that is extreme bad behavior, like consistent disobedience and things. Cutting, abortion, other things like that, they're the people who need the help of a youth group the most, not to be kicked out. I was also home-schooled. I turned out OK. Finished when I was 13. Waste so much time in public schools, and there's so many extracurricular activities you can do, not to mention you learn "life skills" when Homeschooled. I'll never forget the day, I was 15, and my friends found it fascinating to deposit money back into an ATM using an envelope. I couldn't care less, we did it bi-weekly... Real life things...	Chilling_Silence (9)
1260925	2012-02-27 06:56:00	Ive had fantastic support and feedback from other Homeschool parents, we have met with MOE and they beleive in us enought to refer us to GSE to say yes or no to free correspondence school. They also suggested counceling, and i said weve worked with 4 differnt places in the past, do we need to go back again i asked.... he shook his head, i took this as a no...... he said he would ring the in home assesor today and get back to us as soon as possible......... so some body high up in the word of education beleives us. now we just wait.....	beetle (243)
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