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Thread ID: 123820	2012-03-18 08:41:00	Monday Laughs..........Belated St Patricks Day Humour................	Billy T (70)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
1265725	2012-03-19 03:45:00	Another Belated One. :) HERE (www.youtube.com)	B.M. (505)
1265726	2012-03-19 05:45:00	Another Belated One. :) HERE (www.youtube.com) Awesome - a great find!	johcar (6283)
1265727	2012-03-19 08:47:00	Isn't it curious? If you told the same jokes about the maori or any other race you would be branded rascist, but it's okay to tell jokes about the Irish. It's a good thing that we Irish are not easily offended, eh? Oi kin get away wit it becos Oi'm part irish meself on me mither's side, her Dai were 100-Proof Oirish so he was, and a drunken sot to boot. It's OK to take the piss outa me own kith & kin. Cheers Billy 8-{)	Billy T (70)
1265728	2012-03-19 22:27:00	I can't come up with any Irish flying jokes, so this'll have to do; A couple of drinkin' buddies, who are airplane mechanics, are in the hanger at Heathrow; it's fogged in and they have nothing to do. One of them says to the other "Man, have you got anything to drink?" "Nah, but I hear you can drink jet fuel - that'll kinda give you a buzz." So they do, get smashed, and have a beautiful time; like only drinkin' buddies can do. The following morning, one of them wakes up and he knows his head will explode if he gets up. But it doesn't. He gets up and feels good, in fact he feels great - NO hangover! The phone rings, it's his buddy. The buddy says "Hey, how do you feel?" He said, "I feel great!!", and the buddy says, "I feel great too!! You don't have a hangover?" and he says "No - that jet fuel is great stuff - no hangover - we ought to do this more often" "Yeah, we could, but there's just one thing..." "What's that?" "Did you fart yet?" "What??" "Did you FART yet??" "No..." "Well, DON'T, 'cause I'm in Glasgow!!"	WalOne (4202)
1265729	2012-03-20 21:22:00	Another late one: A Utah Mormon was seated next to an Irish Catholic on a flight back to States from London . After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken. The Irishman asked for a whiskey and a glass of Guinness, which was promptly brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the Mormon if he would like a drink. He replied in disgust, "I'd rather be savagely raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips." The Irishman then handed his drinks back to the attendant and said, "Me too, I didn't know we had a choice."	johcar (6283)
1265730	2012-03-20 21:24:00	And a non-Irish one: Two women were out for a Saturday stroll. One had a Doberman and the other, a Chihuahua. As they walked down the street, the one with the Doberman said to her friend, "Let's go over to that bar for a drink." The lady with the Chihuahua said, "We can't go in there. We've got dogs with us." The one with the Doberman said, "Just watch, and do as I do." They walked over to the bar and the one with the Doberman put on a pair of dark glasses and started to walk in. The bouncer at the door said, "Sorry, lady, no pets allowed." The woman with the Doberman said, "You don't understand. This is my seeing-eye dog." The bouncer said, "A Doberman?" The woman said, "Yes, they're using them now. They're very good." The bouncer said, "OK, come on in." The lady with the Chihuahua thought that convincing him that a Chihuahua was a seeing-eye dog may be a bit more difficult, but thought, "What the heck," so she put on her dark glasses and started to walk in. Once again the bouncer said, "Sorry, lady, no pets allowed." The woman said, "You don't understand. This is my seeing-eye dog" The bouncer said, "A Chihuahua?" The woman with the Chihuahua said, "A Chihuahua? They gave me a Chihuahua ?!"	johcar (6283)
1265731	2012-03-21 02:58:00	Read to the end before making a judgment This test only has one question, but it's a very important one. By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally. The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a decision. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous. Please scroll down slowly and give due consideration to each line. *** THE SITUATION: *** You are in London . There is chaos all around you caused by a hurricane with severe flooding. This is a flood of biblical proportions. You are a photo-journalist working for a major newspaper, and you're caught in the middle of this epic disaster. The situation is nearly hopeless. You're trying to shoot career-making photos. There are houses and people swirling around you, some disappearing into the water. Nature is unleashing all of its destructive fury. *** THE TEST: *** Suddenly, you see a man in the water. He is fighting for his life, trying not to be taken down with the debris You move closer... Somehow, the man looks familiar.... You suddenly realize who it is.... It's the Muslim Cleric, Abu Hamza, the one-eyed, hook handed bastard who hates non-Muslims and wants the UK to become an Islamic state!! You notice that the raging waters are about to take him under forever. You have two options: You can save the life of Abu or you can shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo, documenting the death of one of the country's most despised, evil and powerful men! *** NOW THE QUESTION AND PLEASE GIVE AN HONEST ANSWER *** Would you select high contrast colour film or, would you go with the classic simplicity of black and white?	Gobe1 (6290)
1265732	2012-03-21 05:23:00	Read to the end before making a judgment This test only has one question, but it's a very important one. By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally. The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a decision. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous. Please scroll down slowly and give due consideration to each line. *** THE SITUATION: *** You are in London . There is chaos all around you caused by a hurricane with severe flooding. This is a flood of biblical proportions. You are a photo-journalist working for a major newspaper, and you're caught in the middle of this epic disaster. The situation is nearly hopeless. You're trying to shoot career-making photos. There are houses and people swirling around you, some disappearing into the water. Nature is unleashing all of its destructive fury. *** THE TEST: *** Suddenly, you see a man in the water. He is fighting for his life, trying not to be taken down with the debris You move closer... Somehow, the man looks familiar.... You suddenly realize who it is.... It's the Muslim Cleric, Abu Hamza, the one-eyed, hook handed bastard who hates non-Muslims and wants the UK to become an Islamic state!! You notice that the raging waters are about to take him under forever. You have two options: You can save the life of Abu or you can shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo, documenting the death of one of the country's most despised, evil and powerful men! *** NOW THE QUESTION AND PLEASE GIVE AN HONEST ANSWER *** Would you select high contrast colour film or, would you go with the classic simplicity of black and white? Black and white gives an image much more drama so that's what I would use, although being a digital I would shoot in colour and then photoshop it to black and white	gary67 (56)
1265733	2012-03-21 07:42:00	Isn't it curious? If you told the same jokes about the maori or any other race you would be branded rascist, but it's okay to tell jokes about the Irish. It's a good thing that we Irish are not easily offended, eh? Loved the jokes. Thanks, Billy. Same with us Kiwis' and "sheep", we all take in good humour. Lurking.	Lurking (218)
1265734	2012-03-21 20:11:00	Not a St Pat's joke, but on an ecclesiastical note: A guy goes into the confessional box after years being away from the Church. He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down. There's a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, fine red wine, Guinness on tap, cigars and liqueur chocolates nearby... and on the wall a fine photographic display of buxom ladies who appear to have mislaid their garments. He hears a priest come in: "Father, forgive me for it's been a very long time since I've been to confession and I must admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than it used to be". The priest replies, "Get out, you idiot. You're on my side".	WalOne (4202)
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