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Thread ID: 28372 2002-12-17 20:49:00 Windows Error Messages – A Cautionary Tale… Babe Ruth (416) Press F1
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106993 2002-12-17 20:49:00 Thought I would share the following I received in an email from Paula Sharick of Windows & . Net Magazine (http://www . winnetmag . com)

Babe .
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Zen and the Art of Error Messages
“It’s time to wrap up yet another year of bugs, blue screens, diagnostic techniques, and troubleshooting topics . I’d like to finish the year on a positive note, and to that end, I'll share with you the contents of an email message I received a few days ago . The message describes a novel and appealing alternative to the cryptic error messages we receive every day—one that delivers bad news with poetry and style . The introduction that accompanied this message claims that technology folks in Japan have replaced Windows’ vague and, oftentimes, downright ugly errors with haiku messages that precisely describe the situation .
For those of you who've forgotten your high school English lessons, the rules for composing haiku are strict and thus appeal to techies who like order in the universe . Each poem has 17 syllables: The first line has five, the second line has seven, and the third line has five . I’m sure you’ll enjoy the contrast between the graceful, empathetic, mystical haiku messages and the harsh, tech-speak Windows versions, as Table 1 lists . I’d opt for the haiku version; nothing like a spoonful of sugar to make the medicine go down . Happy holidays to all! “

Table 1: A Kinder, Gentler Windows
Haiku Error Message Windows Error Message
Your file was so big . File not found
It might be very useful
But now it is gone .

The web site you seek Internet Explorer was not able to open this Internet Site .
Cannot be located but The requested site is either unavailable or cannot be found .
Countless more exist .

Chaos reigns within . The system process Lsass . exe terminated unexpectedly with
Reflect, repent and reboot . status code -1073741819 . The system will now shut down
Order shall return . and restart

Windows NT crashed . Stop 0xC2 BAD_POOL_CALLER
I am the Blue Screen of Death .
No one hears your screams .

Program aborting: Explorer caused an invalid page fault in module filename .
Close all that you have worked on .
You ask far too much .

Yesterday it worked . The instruction at "0xXXXXXXXX" referenced memory at
Today it is not working . "0xXXXXXXXX" . The Memory could not be "read" .
Windows is like that .

First snow, then silence . Code 28 CM_PROB_FAILED_INSTALLED
The thousand-dollar screen dies
So beautifully .


With searching comes loss Search is complete, there are no results to display .
And the presence of absence:
"My Novel" not found .

The Tao that is seen Error printing document, retry or cancel?
Is not the true Tao until
You bring fresh toner .

Stay the patient course . RPC server is unavailable .
Of little worth is your ire .
The network is down .

A crash reduces SpTimeoutSynchronized: Adapter 0X80F09790 had
Your expensive computer interrupt pending- the system may not be delivering
To a simple stone . interrupts from this adapter .


Three things are certain: {Delayed Write Failed} . Windows was unable to save
Death, taxes and lost data . all the data for the file x . data has been lost .
The Guess which has occurred .

You step in the stream 302 - Object Moved or 404 - File not Found .
But the water has moved on .
This page is not here .

Out of memory . Your system is running without a properly sized paging file .
We wish to hold the whole sky
But we never will .

Having been erased, Search is complete . There are no results to display .
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped .

Serious error . Explorer . exe has generated errors and will be closed
All shortcuts have disappeared . by Windows . Dr Watson will run and create a log file .
Screen . Mind . Both are blank .
Babe Ruth (416)
106994 2002-12-17 21:19:00 :D

Some people have far too much time on their hand to think these things up, and Im glad they do :D:D:D
Chilling_Silence (9)
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