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Thread ID: 127522	2012-10-28 09:23:00	Monday Laughs.....Wise Words, ladies of the night, and Spam l am............	Billy T (70)	PC World Chat

Post ID	Timestamp	Content	User
1309252	2012-11-01 02:26:00	SWMBO rushes to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out . She sobs, "Doctor, take a look at me . When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were blood-shot and bugging out, and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What's wrong with me, Doctor?" The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says, "Well, I can tell you one thing . . . there's nothing wrong with your eyesight . " :lol:	WalOne (4202)
1309253	2012-11-01 02:37:00	This is not a joke. (But I laughed) Husband was having an eye test and thought he'd mention that often one eye felt like he'd have something in it and would be a bit blurry. He's been imaging all sorts of eye diseases for months..... Optical doctor had a look and said, hmmm, you might want to trim or pluck your eyelashes........................ (Husband is getting a bit elderly now......you know the eyebrows, ear hairs etc grow long in old age?...well, there you go, so do the eyelashes apparently)	pctek (84)
1309254	2012-11-01 02:41:00	:lol: nice one! A Russian man was stumbling down the street after a night at the pub and kicked a bottle he saw on the side of the road and POOF a gene appeared . He said "I will grant you one wish!" . The Russian thinks for a while in his drunk state and says "I love vodka so much I want to be able to p*ss vodka on demand!" and thus his wish was granted . He went home and grabbed a glass and began to urinate into it . The clear substance looked like vodka so the Russian took a swig . It was the greatest vodka he'd ever tasted! He called to the wife "Natasha come and taste this vodka!" . The wife too thought it was the greatest vodka ever! Each night the Russian would get home and call his wife to bring 2 glasses to the lounge where he would proceed to urinate into both and they would enjoy the beautiful vodka . Then one Friday night he gets home and calls for his wife to bring only 1 glass to the lounge . The wife asks "darling, why do you only want 1 glass tonight?" He replies "My love, tonight you drink from the bottle!"	lordnoddy (3645)
1309255	2012-11-01 06:25:00	:lol:	WalOne (4202)
1309256	2012-11-01 22:40:00	Angela hosted a dinner party recently for family far and wide and everyone was encouraged to bring their children as well . During dinner my four-year-old granddaughter Kate stared at me sitting across from her . The girl could hardly eat her food for staring . I checked my shirt for spots, felt my face for food, patted my hair in place but nothing stopped her from staring at me . I tried my best to just ignore her but finally it was too much for me . I finally asked Kate "Why are you staring at me?" Everyone at the table had noticed her behavior and the table went quiet for her response . Kate said "I'm just waiting to see how you drink like a fish . " :lol:	WalOne (4202)
1309257	2012-11-02 23:18:00	SWBO asked me to go out shopping for something to make her look sexy . You should have seen her face when I came back with 12 Steinies . . .	WalOne (4202)
1309258	2012-11-03 02:19:00	A blonde decides to do something wild she hasn't done before, so she sets out to rent her first X-rated adult video. She goes to the video store and, after looking around for a while, selects a title that sounds very stimulating. ...She drives home, lights some candles, slips into something comfortable, and puts the tape in the VCR. To her disappointment, there's nothing but static on the screen, so she calls the video store to complain. Blonde: "I just rented an adult movie from you and there's nothing on the tape, but static." Store Clerk: "Sorry about, that. We've had problems with some of those tapes. Which title did you rent?" Blonde: "It's called 'Head Cleaner'	wainuitech (129)
1309259	2012-11-03 04:31:00	Blonde: "It's called 'Head Cleaner' This gets my vote for the best of this week WT! :banana :rolleyes:;)	WalOne (4202)
1309260	2012-11-03 08:02:00	A blonde decides to do something wild she hasn't done before, so she sets out to rent her first X-rated adult video. She goes to the video store and, after looking around for a while, selects a title that sounds very stimulating. ...She drives home, lights some candles, slips into something comfortable, and puts the tape in the VCR. To her disappointment, there's nothing but static on the screen, so she calls the video store to complain. Blonde: "I just rented an adult movie from you and there's nothing on the tape, but static." Store Clerk: "Sorry about, that. We've had problems with some of those tapes. Which title did you rent?" Blonde: "It's called 'Head Cleaner' When she returned the tape to the store she was greeted with sincere apologies. She reported to her equally blonde sister that to make up for the trouble they would give her a free DVD rewinder for a bit of labour saving on her future rentals.	R2x1 (4628)
1309261	2012-11-03 08:08:00	When she returned the tape to the store she was greeted with sincere apologies. She reported to her equally blonde sister that to make up for the trouble they would give her a free DVD rewinder for a bit of labour saving on her future rentals. :D :lol: Actually seen that on a DVD case - Please rewind Tape. :groan: :D	wainuitech (129)
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